Choose

Someone said

“I don’t know how you do it”.

I said

“I wasn’t given a choice”.

This post was made this morning by a 35-year-old friend who is in the early stages of a cancer diagnosis and treatment regime.  To say that her world has been rocked is a massive understatement and yet, she presents with strength and positivity. I can only imagine the times when she is challenged by different feelings and thoughts.    

How do you do it?

British Daoist monk David Lees talks about the Carousel of Despair being the start to most people’s journeys when they are faced with “no choice”. The trigger can be shock. Next thing, you are riding the emotions of fear, anger, grief, hopelessness, distress, overwhelm, panic ... You think that you are powerless and you feel like a victim.  If you don’t know and accept that this is a normal response to ‘no choice’, you may stay on the Carousel of Despair until someone or something stops the ride for you.

On the other hand, if you have awareness, you have choice.

How do YOU do it?

Some people lean in or on others for emotional and professional support. Some may use substances and addictive behaviours to take away the pain. Others may research to find current, high-quality options, people and services.  Then there are those who would turn to psychological and/or spiritual practices. People likely choose their primary area of initial focus: the mind; the body; the body and mind; the body, mind and spirit.

Choice is the key to stopping the Carousel of Despair. And because the journey of “no choice” can be a long and arduous one, there may be a need to place the symbolic or totemic Key of Choice on a strong cord and secure it tightly to the body. There could be choice around the better place to keep it: Near the sacrum, the seat of power or over the heart, the seat of emotional balance and self-awareness.

How do you DO it?

Choice requires action. Internal and external. Choosing action may require the initial decision to believe in yourself. Some people tell me that they choose actions that have led to experiences where they have connected with a force so much greater and more powerful than themselves.  They describe it as sudden, unexpected, overwhelmingly liberating and transformational. Others describe entering a place of deep acceptance and content and experiencing Grace for the first time in their lives. 

Of course, these aren’t places that we dwell in all the rest of the days of our lives.  We have to choose to find our way back there. And sometimes, on a journey of ‘no choice’, we have to choose again and again, hour by hour, minute by minute. We do whatever is required to bring calm and peace in the midst of storm. And, if we choose, we can do it with the support of a trusted ally, teacher or mentor.

Choice is your greatest power. It is an even greater power than love, because you must first choose to be a loving person.”  Caroline Myss